Wednesday, May 21, 2008

This item is really about safe driving!

Today I'm going to mention computer role playing and urinal games, but please bear in mind that I have only one goal in mind: safe driving.

We begin by observing that putting games inside urinals seems to make bathrooms cleaner. A number of experiments along these lines are happening in Europe and Asia, but not, I believe, in our own relatively prudish United States. Here's an example: giving men something to aim at makes a difference.
If you've played computer games, you probably know that as you travel about, you must keep your eyes peeled for valuable items to pick up. They could be hidden anywhere, and you learn to react to the slightest visual cues along the way.
Also, I'm sure you'll agree that superhighways of the future will be heavily networked, and your future auto will have a fancy computer system that communicates with the highway's computers. All of these computers will interact with you by placing displays on your front windshield, since that's a great way to make you see warnings abot road problems.
Finally, I'm sure you'll agree that the safest drivers on fast highways will be those who are staying alert for the slightest sign of trouble: in front of them, to the rear, to the sides; and well in advance.

To put this all together, imagine that your toll for driving a super highway is discounted by the number of, let's call them "brabs", that you see along the way. The highway and your car's master computer cooperate with your windshield to make it seem to you that brabs are hiding along the road. And of course you watch alertly for these brabs and click some switch when you see them, to lower your tolls. Your general alertness thus contributes to overall road safety. I think this is a win-win idea, and I hope to see it in my lifetime.

As an added benefit: if you fail to find even the easiest brabs, a police car may stop you to see whether you're half asleep. And if you find hundreds of non-existent brabs, you might be checked for LSD.

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